Grand Theft Obelisk

..So I was lurking in the Recruitment Channel when I found pilot twentyafter looking for some new additions to his corp.  As fate would have it, I think that I would make a great addition!  Eve is all about “Emergent Gameplay”, and I have that in spades.

[ 2013.09.12 20:58:25 ] twentyafter > FREE WEED FOR EVERY NEW MEMBER!!  Twenty’s Mining and Industrial – Looking for miners and mission runners

As I can be anything a corp wants, I convo twentyafter stating that I am in fact a miner as well as mission runner.

[ 2013.09.12 20:23:13 ] Syds Sinclair > Howdy
[ 2013.09.12 20:23:48 ] Syds Sinclair > So looking for members/
[ 2013.09.12 20:24:02 ] twentyafter > I sure am
[ 2013.09.12 20:24:37 ] twentyafter > What do you like to do in Eve?
[ 2013.09.12 20:24:58 ] twentyafter > I see you are a older player, that’s great!
[ 2013.09.12 20:27:53 ] Syds Sinclair > I mostly trade and do indy things
[ 2013.09.12 20:27:57 ] Syds Sinclair > Mine and manufacture
[ 2013.09.12 20:28:00 ] Syds Sinclair > And what not haha
[ 2013.09.12 20:32:38 ] Syds Sinclair > When I do mission I do it in a broke down Raven lol
[ 2013.09.12 20:32:56 ] Syds Sinclair > Missioning isn’t my forte exactly haha
[ 2013.09.12 20:33:56 ] twentyafter > lol, nothing wrong with the raven. I fly a Golem for missions and pick up wrecks and salvage with my Noctis
[ 2013.09.12 20:34:31 ] twentyafter > that’s actually what I am doing right now

Missioning in a Golem right now?  Color me interested.  Everything is looking great until twenty’s brain tries to process more information then a  HighSec carebear is capable of:

[ 2013.09.12 20:40:04 ] twentyafter > I’ll be afk too while my salvage drones do their work
[ 2013.09.12 20:46:03 ] twentyafter > i’m back…I really hate to ask this, but curiosity has got me, i noticed in your employment history you have been in and out of a lot of corps lately. That along with your high bounty has me curious
[ 2013.09.12 21:23:02 ] Syds Sinclair > Hey I’m back
[ 2013.09.12 21:23:16 ] Syds Sinclair > Yeah I just got back from about an 8 month break from Eve
[ 2013.09.12 21:23:31 ] Syds Sinclair > Before that I bounced around corps looking to keep my interest in Eve
[ 2013.09.12 21:23:44 ] Syds Sinclair > But I was just burnt out and needed a break
I drop my standard “I was burnt out and hopping corps to keep interested in Eve…Totally not killing corp members and moving on” line.  Works 100% of the time 20% of the time.
[ 2013.09.12 21:23:54 ] twentyafter > ah, I understand how that is. I almost did that but just started this one
[ 2013.09.12 21:26:11 ] twentyafter > Well, I’d love to have you join if your interested. would be the first one
[ 2013.09.12 21:26:32 ] Syds Sinclair > Yeah that would be grea
[ 2013.09.12 21:26:33 ] Syds Sinclair > great

Twentyafter falls within that 20%.

[ 2013.09.12 22:02:37 ] Syds Sinclair > Oh and GTA V release date, I probably wont be very active in Eve for about a week haha
[ 2013.09.12 22:02:45 ] twentyafter > ah, reason i mention it is Grand Theft Auto 5 comes out next week and I may not be on Eve as much
[ 2013.09.12 22:02:49 ] twentyafter > lol
[ 2013.09.12 22:03:01 ] Syds Sinclair > lmao haha
[ 2013.09.12 22:03:07 ] twentyafter > perfect!
[ 2013.09.12 22:03:33 ] Syds Sinclair > Yeah I think the Eve servers are going to be pretty light that week
[ 2013.09.12 22:03:53 ] twentyafter > lol, your probably right
[ 2013.09.12 22:04:05 ] Syds Sinclair > Let me dock up and I’ll drop an app

We seemed to be on the same page about GTA.  Too bad twenty meant Grand Theft Auto, while I was talking about Grand Theft Aero.
Now, this next part of the convo really emphasises the imporant work that AWOXers do.  Mr. twentyafter fancies himself a Capsuleer, a honorable pastime.  But, there are other “missions” that a pod pilot must complete before he can be a space fairing, imortal entity.  Read on:

[ 2013.09.12 21:59:43 ] twentyafter > I’m in my early 30′s and married, no kids, so I am not online everyday. I am on quite a bit to avoid having to watch my wife’s TV shows, lol
[ 2013.09.12 22:05:25 ] twentyafter > right now i am usually home by 4 CST, but I am not “technically” employed so whenever I find a new job that could change. Wife usually home by 7-8 CST and I sometimes log off when she gets home
[ 2013.09.12 22:05:53 ] twentyafter > lately I have been online daily

Tisk tisk.  A pod pilot who isn’t “Technically Employed” but is “Online Daily” in Eve. CONCORD must be hard at work tracking down deadbeat Capsuleers just like twenty.
I had to weigh my options.  Twenty is a 9 year old pilot flying a Golem.  I have to expect that he has a pretty good tank.  Syds is greatly skilled into killing Orca’s and the like, but I had reservations about engaging a pilot whose tank I might not be able to break.  I decided to bring in my alt, sniperDK.  He would provide the ganke while Syds provided the tank via a repping Osprey.

[ 2013.09.12 22:26:12 ] Syds Sinclair > I just convo’d an old friend about joining me in this new corp, he should be convoing you soon
[ 2013.09.12 22:26:20 ] twentyafter > he just did
[ 2013.09.12 22:26:54 ] Syds Sinclair > Oh ok haha cool, sniperDK. He’s more on the combat/mission side
[ 2013.09.12 22:56:03 ] EVE System > Channel changed to Corp : Twenty’s Mining and Industrial
[ 2013.09.12 22:56:13 ] twentyafter > o/
[ 2013.09.12 22:56:20 ] sniperDK > o/
[ 2013.09.12 22:56:24 ] twentyafter > ok, i’m gonna close the chat’s i have with both of you
[ 2013.09.12 22:56:31 ] sniperDK > ok
[ 2013.09.12 22:57:01 ] twentyafter > Syds, when you dock see if you have access to the hanger with your name on it
[ 2013.09.12 22:57:10 ] sniperDK > hey syds me and u again haha

I was actively trying to show a difference in Syds and sniper.  Mostly I just made sure that Syds typed with proper grammer, and sniper did not.  Worked pretty good.

[ 2013.09.12 23:16:20 ] twentyafter > mission is herei’ll let you know when to warp to me

Warp, lock, unload.

[ 2013.09.12 23:36:32 ] twentyafter > wtf?
[ 2013.09.12 23:36:37 ] sniperDK > Sorry Bro
[ 2013.09.12 23:37:22 ] sniperDK > Is what it is
[ 2013.09.12 23:37:24 ] twentyafter > fucking bullshit
[ 2013.09.12 23:37:39 ] sniperDK > I know
[ 2013.09.12 23:37:42 ] sniperDK > Ok so here goes
[ 2013.09.12 23:37:51 ] sniperDK > Me and Syds are in this for the Blex
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:09 ] sniperDK > Plex
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:17 ] twentyafter > that’s real fucked up guys
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:30 ] twentyafter > took me a lot of time to put this ship together
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:31 ] sniperDK > We are willing to talk abot a ransom
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:38 ] sniperDK > if you are
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:40 ] twentyafter > 53mil all i got
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:48 ] sniperDK > Not enough
[ 2013.09.12 23:38:58 ] sniperDK > I’m thinking golem 400m
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:21 ] twentyafter > fuck you both
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:25 ] sniperDK > Sorry man
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:32 ] sniperDK > is what it is
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:35 ] sniperDK > Up to you
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:41 ] sniperDK > 300m for your ship
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:49 ] twentyafter > i got a obleick
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:54 ] twentyafter > but would have to sell it
[ 2013.09.12 23:39:58 ] sniperDK > obleick?
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:04 ] twentyafter > obelisk
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:09 ] sniperDK > hmm
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:11 ] twentyafter > twentyafter’s Obelisk
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:20 ] sniperDK > contract it to me and deal

An Obelisk you say?  I like it.

[ 2013.09.12 23:40:42 ] sniperDK > as you probably guessd, ive stopped shooting you
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:48 ] sniperDK > but this will not last
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:51 ] sniperDK > we need our plex
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:56 ] sniperDK > clock is ticking
[ 2013.09.12 23:40:59 ] twentyafter > i’m working on it
[ 2013.09.12 23:41:06 ] sniperDK > it doesnt do anything for us to kill you
[ 2013.09.12 23:41:12 ] sniperDK > isk is our game
[ 2013.09.12 23:41:16 ] sniperDK > stop shooting
[ 2013.09.12 23:41:26 ] twentyafter > it’s senbt
[ 2013.09.12 23:42:06 ] sniperDK > ok now that 100m
[ 2013.09.12 23:42:27 ] twentyafter > i don’t have 100mil, i just gave you a bil isk ship. let me go
[ 2013.09.12 23:42:39 ] sniperDK > contract?
[ 2013.09.12 23:42:42 ] sniperDK > to me or syds?
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:02 ] sniperDK > Me or syds??
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:07 ] twentyafter > you
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:13 ] twentyafter > Obelisk
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:13 ] sniperDK > lemme see
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:21 ] sniperDK > ok 100m
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:46 ] twentyafter > what 100 mil do you want me to give you
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:46 ] sniperDK > shield’s tickin
[ 2013.09.12 23:43:53 ] twentyafter > i have 53
[ 2013.09.12 23:44:25 ] sniperDK > sucks man
[ 2013.09.12 23:44:29 ] sniperDK > needed that 100m
[ 2013.09.12 23:44:40 ] twentyafter > what about the fucking contract for the ship?
[ 2013.09.12 23:45:23 ] sniperDK > Obelisk?

I accepted the contract for the Obelisk, but fuck, broker fees and station taxes kill you.  I would be lucky to clear 900m after selling it.  As a good businessman. I suggested that twenty pay for the bureaucratic fees.  He declined, and left me no other option then to try and recoup some of my expences via the loot from his Golem.

[ 2013.09.12 23:46:00 ] twentyafter > enjoy my nice mods fucktardsd

Thanks loot fairy!
Yeah, those should cover my station taxes.  Can’t let the Government shut down!

[ 2013.09.12 23:46:10 ] sniperDK > sorry bud
[ 2013.09.12 23:46:23 ] twentyafter > your not sorry
[ 2013.09.12 23:46:25 ] twentyafter > not at all

He was right.  I wasn’t sorry.

[ 2013.09.12 23:51:14 ] twentyafter > i don’t really care
[ 2013.09.12 23:51:18 ] sniperDK > Loot fairy was good to me
[ 2013.09.12 23:51:40 ] twentyafter > i will report both of you to CCP, not that it will do any good
[ 2013.09.12 23:51:41 ] sniperDK > Mind if I ask you a question?
[ 2013.09.12 23:51:51 ] sniperDK > Please, report us
[ 2013.09.12 23:51:54 ] sniperDK > Wont do any good
[ 2013.09.12 23:52:18 ] sniperDK > But please report us

I forget what the question I was trying to ask twenty was, but maybe the GM that contacts me will be able to.  I’m still waiting on that GM convo…
All in all it was about a 1.7 billion AWOX.  I was able to sell his dropped mods and Obelisk in Jita.  Twentyafter logged after I killed his Golem, but  I ended up sitting cloaked in a safe spot in space hoping I would be able to do a little more GTA or collect some severance pay.
I noticed him log back in a few hours, so I tried to provoke him a bit:

[ 2013.09.14 03:01:51 ] Syds Sinclair > Howdy partner
[ 2013.09.14 03:08:53 ] Syds Sinclair > You think about it and let me know
[ 2013.09.14 03:09:00 ] Syds Sinclair > Not wasting time, station trading from space, lol
[ 2013.09.14 03:09:05 ] Syds Sinclair > Good isk, this AFK cloak game
[ 2013.09.14 03:09:14 ] Syds Sinclair > I’ll be back in a few
[ 2013.09.14 03:09:23 ] Syds Sinclair > OR WILL I?!

As it turns out, my real life work schedule, day lights savings time, and Eve maintenance do not align.  So I tried to bluff him, but I was only able to sit cloaked in space whilst still a member of twenty’s corp for approx. 10 hours before he was able to boot me.
What would you guys have done differently?  Think you could have bled some more ISK out of this unemployed Capsuleer?

Fly like a senile old coot!